Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Parenting - How To Make The Appropriate Choices

By Carol T. Martell


Though it is a blessing to be a parent, there are challenges that we must all face as our children grow up right before our eyes. Your job is to be prepared because as a parent, you never know what to expect from your children as they mature, which means you must have strategies ready to implement. The following techniques are used by successful parents everyday and it will help you raise your kids as well.

Even though there are a variety of ideas about the preferred style of parenting, the consensus seems to be that the most effective approach is the one known as authoritative. The difference between authoritative and authoritarian is that the latter means obeying without asking any questions, the former is firm but flexible and allowing some discussion. The authoritative parent recognizes the need for rules, but balances this out with the willingness to have open dialogues with the child. A child who grows up in an overly permissive household will often lack direction in life, but one whose parents are overly strict may have trouble thinking for himself. There's nothing wrong with giving your kids freedom, but it has to be tempered with a recognition that they're still kids and need some limits.

If your kids do something praiseworthy, don't forget to acknowledge it. Parents sometimes get into the habit of only noticing the mistakes their children make. Praising children for something well done is a way to encourage them in this area. Praise is something all children need for them to develop a healthy self image. It's not necessary to do this in an insincere way, as your kids will be able to sense this, but choose times when it's appropriate.

Is it possible to change your child's behavior and make them stop doing inappropriate things? By far, the most effective strategy is to give your child to choices to make. Choices are a great way to teach your child how to make positive and good decisions, while not focusing upon the negatives so much. For example, your child may be digging around in your freshly planted garden that you worked several days on.

Bad choices can be averted by providing two or more good choices that the child can select from and make the situation better. By doing this, you now have control of the bad situation, and your child can make a good choice. At times, parenting is a joy, while at other times it can be a nightmare. You can only be the best parent you can at any given moment. Every parent ultimately has to create his or her own particular parenting style, though it can help to study what the experts say.




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